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Sunday, January 20, 2008 @ 8:08 PM
church. so glad I didnt give it a miss even though I was dying from the fatigue. the bi-product of not enough sleep I guess, maybe the formula can go something like: fatigue is represented by y human is represented by k amt of sleep is represented by x since inverse proportion is Y= k / x the fatigue level of a human is inversely proportionate to the amount of sleep one has. agree? today's sermon and worship struck a chord in me, reminded me something so vital, so close, that I am surprised that I even had to be reminded. what a fool I have been, for such a longlong time. been living life, for the sake of living it. so empty inside, for such a long time. a year, perhaps. delved under illusions, frantic prayers, then the slowly closing of the heart. Lord I am coming back to the heart of worship, where it is all about you, all about you. been highly cynical recently, oddly. the thoughts that pops up into my mind all seem to be faintly mocking, with a vague sense of disbelieve. no longer able to trust, so easily, so without questions, so doubtless. I miss my innocence. I really do. so torn apart, the tension is running high. am so pissed and furstrated, and my sounding board's been acting weirdly recently too. heck. ohgod, I hate life. I need a remedy, now. hell. why dont I get everything in life running as it should? |
protagonist Geraldine snow_ball1994@hotmail.com cedarian cedarELDDS;debator sec3ELfamilyofai! clique1H'07; 2H'08 Echo 2008 ; the ten of us, plus the four instructors <33 ♥ The most important things are the hardest to say, because words diminish them. archives September 2007 October 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 ledastray
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