Sunday, February 17, 2008 @ 9:26 PM


I am super filled angst now. The past week that I have denied or pushed back for the sake of JGs has just tumbled on me. isnt it great, how things turn out?

I am superbly unhappy. yes. so you ask, what's new? actually, nothing's new. My is a life filled with being pushed aside when not needed, never treasured, never wanted. always something extra, always someone to be murmured about behind. great? fine? yeah.

first it was within el. then that was resolved. then after the CNY crap, then I dont know.

first it was last year, now?

first it was you two. now?

I dont know, I cant know.

I am sick of putting on a nice front smilling away.

I am so so so sick of you. especially you. that comment you made hit home. indeed, no one's ever on my side without even wanting to hear my story. What have I done wrong? Am I just your punching bag? Am I just the one you turn to when you need? What am I to you? What,exactly? Nothing helps. I only want to cry, to shake you so hard you grit your teeth. Do you know how hard I have to still my head to not raise my voice at you, to slam the facts in your face, those that you so treasure? Arent you spoilt?

I dont know. Shall continue being the useless one, I guess.

Maths.





protagonist


Geraldine
snow_ball1994@hotmail.com

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