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Friday, April 4, 2008 @ 9:37 PM
what's the meaning of trying so hard, when ultimately, you just dont have it in you? HP nominees were annouced today. Joy's one of them, yay. (: see, I have really really capable seniors okay! and in that same thought flow, it strikes me that I aint one. No matter how many times people tell me how they always see me with them, they dont know that I will never fit in, just truly, fit in. they try their very best to not make me feel excluded, they try, they really do, and I really really appreciate those efforts during the span of JG's. but the fact is, I wont be one of them. coz, I aint. I wont be as capable as them, wont be as good as them, and they pull it off effortlessly, it's part of them. cant say the same for myself I guess. that piece of paper on the board outside the PR really took more from me than I thought. talk by fiona didnt help either. doing the personality and leadership quiz didnt help either. and, el sec2s have to run for el exco. nopesnopes, not going to help at all. couldnt think during art. self portrayal? I only wanted to take a black color pencil and shade the box black, black, jet black. I couldnt say what I liked, who I was. cause, all of those notions were beaten down when I donned my blue-grey uniform. wait, I wasnt who I was either in primary school either. was just a face to a badge. an unworthy face at that. HA. sec1s have finished their interview already, will be welcoming the sec1s next week then. debaters at last, they have an identity to their cca, instead of hovering between the inbetween mark I guess. what have I become? |
protagonist Geraldine snow_ball1994@hotmail.com cedarian cedarELDDS;debator sec3ELfamilyofai! clique1H'07; 2H'08 Echo 2008 ; the ten of us, plus the four instructors <33 ♥ The most important things are the hardest to say, because words diminish them. archives September 2007 October 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 ledastray
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